How can I stay on plan when I have an unsupportive Spouse/Partner?

There are times in our lives that we don’t always see eye to eye with our spouse or partner, especially when we are making lifestyle changes. This could present itself in many different ways, but for some taking control of how we look and feel can raise some unintentional disagreements.  Just a few examples are questioning why you want to lose weight when your partner feels you are perfect the way you are, bringing in takeaways for tea or cooking non-healthy foods, or even in some worst cases ridiculing you for being on a diet.  This can put a strain on any relationship and sometimes it can be all too easy to want an easy life with no arguments and therefore you give in and come off plan.

The truth is a lot of what your spouse/partner is saying or doing is because they simply do not understand. They don’t understand the plan and they don’t understand why you want to be on a diet because they do in all honesty love you just the way you are.  The trick is to help them understand your reasons for wanting to lose weight from your perspective.  

Here we look at ways to encourage your spouse/partner into being supportive on your weight loss journey, and help them to see it from your point of view.

The first step would be to have a conversation with them. Explain to them fully and honestly why you want to lose weight, how you feel the way you are currently and what it is doing to your health. Show them the plan and how it works along with our success stories. You may find that your spouse/partner has been worried the diet is not safe for you and this will help put their mind at ease. Perhaps their perception has been that its a fad that will not work but by explaining the plans and showing evidence of the success stories they can then see this is a genuine successful diet that has proven health benefits.

Couple Talking

If you have tried in the past to have a face to face conversation and it has not worked, try writing it down in a letter and give this to them. Often, if we find it hard to express our feelings, putting pen to paper really helps open you up to honestly saying how you feel without the dread of a possible negative response.

Maybe they feel that they will miss out on quality time with you while you are focusing on your weight loss journey. Get them involved, cook together especially if you are following the Lifestyle plan. The evening low carb meal is a great way for couple’s to spend some time together cooking up a delicious evening meal that is healthy for you both, whilst perhaps you chat about your day. Enjoy going out together for walks and gentle exercise.  If you have normal routines like meeting up with friends, family etc, continue to do so.  Don’t close yourself off from socialising together with others.  These are all things you can do together and your spouse/partner will not feel left out.  Reassure them that you can still enjoy date nights such as the cinema or even a meal out at your favourite restaurant as you can still stay on plan and enjoy date night at the same time.

Explain to them the positives of the plan such as your weight losses and your inch losses so they can see the positive effect it is having on you. This can create encouragement from your spouse/partner when they see how well you are doing which will give you that motivational boost too. Remember to also thank them for their kind words as this will show them that you are appreciating all their efforts of supporting you.

If your spouse/partner is still unsupportive then seek support elsewhere. Our customer care advisers are always available on the website via our live chat function or by telephone during office hours. You will also find great support on our Facebook Page. We have fantastic members that are always welcoming and happy to share hints and tips and their experiences too. Remember you don’t have to do the diet alone we are here to support you too.

Is your partner/spouse supportive? How do they show they are fully behind you?  What experiences have you had with other friends/family.  Share your experiences for a chance to win your choice of three Beanies Coffee’s by Wednesday 1st June at 4pm.  

By Joanne Jones, Customer Care Advisor

5 comments

  1. My husband is usually very supportive and encourages me on my diet and keeps me on the straight and narrow. However, having just told him that I’ve decided to do a 100 days challenge to keep me focussed and in the zone, he just looked at me and said ‘What’s the point of that? You’re meant to be dieting anyway?’ Sometimes i don’t think they really realise how much self control it takes to remain on plan, or intact, on a diet full stop! So glad I have the company of the Facebook gang to join me and help me along the way 😁

  2. My husband has been very supportive as I have lost weight quickly and he has seen the change in me physically and mentally. Plus I am realising that after this diet I need to rethink my eating habits and not go back to unhealthy food. My whole family are happy with less meat/vegetarian and more vegetables. It might be my diet but it has improved the eating habits of the whole household. Thank you x🥹

  3. It has taken awhile but my husband now is totally supportive. When I first started, he would subconsciously eat ‘bad’ foods that he wouldn’t normally touch. Now, I just tell him “I’m on plan” and he tries his best to not offer me off-plan food (he sometimes forgets then apologises) and brings me my bar with a cup of decaf tea at the end of every day.

  4. I am very lucky. My husband is incredibly supportive with my decision to do the plan. I just say I’ve got my parcel arriving from Slim and Save and he says that’s fine I’ll be here for it. The only pack he really dislikes me eating while he’s in the house is the cheesy pasta so I can’t complain at all really. 😊

  5. My partner eats carbs with every meal and is convinced I’m undernourished if I don’t do the same. He’s loving and supportive in every other part of my life, but is utterly confused by my S&S journey. I’m slowly showing him – one meal at a time – that my weight loss improves life for both of us. He’s my carer and it’s hard work pushing a wheelchair. Weighing less means I’m more independent and he doesn’t have to work so hard. I’ll never change his carb habit, but I’m proving that changing mine is the best thing to do❤

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